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Creating Financial Bliss
By Joy Armstrong
Amid the thoughts of marital bliss, have you and your soon-to-be stopped to think about your financial situation once you begin sharing everything? It’s definitely important to know what type of financial situation you are getting yourself into before hand and talking about it prior to the big day can be one of the most important pre-wedding discussions you have.
Discussing Finances
You might be asking why you need to discuss finances with your partner when it will obviously work itself out after you get married. Brad Brestel an attorney-turned-budget counselor said that financial problems are almost always a part of a troubled relationship. So to keep your relationship out of trouble - discuss finances on a regular basis!
Couples generally always start out with debt of some kind (student loans, credit cards, etc.) and it’s important to discuss these debts with your future spouse so it doesn’t come as a shock once you are married. Once you discuss the amount of debt and see what portion of your income will be allotted to repay debts, it’s a good idea to start discussing who should handle the finances.
Setting a Budget
One thing Brestel emphasized when asked who should be in charge of the budget was that one person shouldn't be solely in charge of the money. Unity isn't attained by one person making all of the decisions. However, if one person in the relationship enjoys being organized and is better with deadlines or writing the checks in a timely manner, then that person should handle the monthly task of paying bills. But when it comes to decisions about how to spend money other than on bills or debt—a joint decision needs to be made. Brestel suggested setting a dollar limit (whatever is comfortable within your budget) and whenever that amount or more is going to be spent, then it should be discussed with your spouse first. For instance, Brestel will not spend more than $100 dollars without talking to his wife first.
Another critical thing he emphasized is to have a set amount of spending money for each person to simply “blow” on whatever they choose so you don't feel like your budget has your hands tied behind your back, and you can't purchase any of your smallest desires. When offering his thoughts on joint verses separate accounts after a couple is married Brestel said ideally it would be a success if a couple could work together well enough to keep one account. That's not a set rule, but it can be a reminder that you and your spouse are in this relationship for life, and your goal should be to create financial harmony working together. If you don't keep that perspective, your finances won't be the only thing in trouble.
Save, Save, Save
So what can you do to safeguard yourself from financial blues? Start by applying some simple guidelines to your marriage finances: bring home your paycheck; give some away to charity; save for your future, and live off the rest (that includes paying off debt). You may be asking if there are warning signs to look for that might suggest your new marriage is headed towards a financial downward spiral? Brestel suggests looking at your financial situation over the first year to see if your debt has increased from what it was when you first got married. If so, then you should seek the services of a trained budget counselor.
Budget Counseling
Budget Counseling is offered free of charge at numerous local churches. Some churches also offer budget classes which are great boosts for new couples in dealing with their finances. Look for Good $ense or Crown Study classes. Brestel recommends a few books to help you get you started on the right path: Your Money Counts, talks about countless ways to organize your money according to biblical principles, and can be purchased from www.crown.org. The Treasure Principle by Randy Alcorn, discusses using money to make a spiritual difference in your life, and can be found on Amazon.com or other book-selling sites.
Brestel’s final piece of advice is to simply remember that unity between couples has to be worked on in all aspects of your marriage - including finances! You and your spouse are coming from two different walks of life and from two unique families. It takes a lot of work and a lot of communication. Brestel can be reached to answer your financial questions at Lincoln Berean Church in Lincoln, Nebraska, www.lincolnberean.org . The church offers classes for new couples in order to organize finances and begin a healthy start to a new life together.
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