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Inspiration Detail | Word to the Wise

Word to the Wise

Have you ever felt like something was both a blessing and a curse? Well, that is how you might feel from time to time about the well-intentioned advice offered as you plan your wedding. How will you possibly determine the good advice from the bad advice – the right information from the wrong information? It’s true that what is acceptable now could be very different from what was appropriate at your grandmother’s wedding over 50 years ago. Since the wedding industry is forever evolving, even some advice you receive from a bride of five to ten years ago may no longer apply.

That is exactly why Nebraska Wedding Day is here to serve you! We are your trusted resource on all things wedding. Not only do we bring you the latest in wedding fashions, floral design, handcrafted details and so much more, we also aid you in determining what is appropriate and what is not. There will always be information floating around that is not necessarily accurate. We are here to help you sort out the misperceptions and to guide you through the most common wedding myths.

Wedding Myth #1
A wedding planner is an unnecessary expense.

Of course a wedding planner will charge a fee for services rendered, but it may be money well spent. Keep in mind that a wedding planner can offer invaluable advice, assist in making decisions and ultimately save you from a multitude of headaches. Additionally, a wedding planner may actually end up saving you money due to his/her business connections within the industry.

For example, you are negotiating a group rate with a hotel for your out-of-town guests, but the hotel is not budging from what you consider to be an unreasonable price for your guests to spend on accommodations. You have your heart set on this particular hotel and are beginning to feel frustrated. You’ve been wasting valuable time on an issue that isn’t getting resolved; but, your wedding planner has worked with this hotel before and has brought them business over the years. She can use her business relationship with the hotel sales manager to not only settle on a more satisfactory rate, but also save you the time and effort of trying to work through an issue that wasn’t going your way. Everyone wins!

Wedding Myth #2
Only the bride should wear white.

Thanks to the high-profile wedding of Prince William and Kate Middleton, the tradition of white being worn only by the bride is no longer a steadfast rule. After all, if the Duchess of Cambridge doesn’t mind her maid of honor wearing a white dress, why should you give it a second thought when your cousin shows up in white? Ideally, close family members should check with the bride before selecting a white dress for the occasion.

When it comes to your wedding party, thankfully there is a wide selection of colors, fabrics and styles available to choose from. It is entirely up to you whether your bridesmaids are decked out in the exact same dress or different shades of your favorite color. You can even mix and match similar styles and hues, as long as the end result is tasteful and coordinated. Regarding shades of white or ivory—as long as you are comfortable sharing your color, everyone else should be as well!

Wedding Myth #3
A DIY wedding will save you money.

If the truth be told, handmade details can be time-consuming and expensive. You may end up learning the hard way after you and your bridesmaids have logged over a hundred hours creating absolutely stunning handcrafted invitations.

Once you have accomplished the invitation project, you realize you also planned on crafting the reception decorations, designing and assembling your own floral arrangements, as well as creating your own wedding favors for a guest list of 200. Your head is spinning! But that’s okay because you are saving a bunch of money, right? Well, not always. Sometimes it turns out that the materials for your beautiful project ended up costing much more than originally intended. When factoring in both manpower and materials, suddenly a DIY wedding doesn’t sound so wonderful after all.

Cheer up! Handcrafted details do not have to overwhelm, as long as your plans are realistic and achievable. Also, keep in mind that there are hundreds of fantastic wedding vendors waiting to do the job for you. Their sole purpose is to help ease your burden and give you what you desire for your special day. Unlike many DIY projects which you may be trying for the first time and praying it works, these vendors have years of experience to draw upon in creating a perfect product for your wedding day. Taking on everything yourself sets you up for a stress level that can be off the charts. Pick a few handcrafted details that truly speak to you and then decide if those projects are something you can tackle. If not, delegate those details to the professionals. They are always happy to be of service!

Wedding Myth #4
Seating charts are a waste of time.

While it’s true that seating charts are not the etiquette requirement they once were, there is still a huge benefit to creating one. Also, keep in mind that if you hire a wedding planner, she can do much of this tedious work for you.

Assigned seating shows your guests that you put great consideration into caring about their comfort at the reception. You will certainly breathe a sigh of relief knowing your Uncle Eddie won’t be getting flirty with your friend Alyssa when they accidentally end up at the same table.
Remember, there are many fun options for seating charts and cards these days! If you are having an outdoor reception, consider something more creative. Utilize the awesome skills of an artsy friend, a little chalkboard paint, and some colorful twine. You can hang the place cards off the backs of the chairs rather than cluttering the tabletop. If it is an elegant indoor reception, have some classy table numbers and place cards printed. This is an easy handcrafted project to accomplish with some nice cardstock, a decorative font style and a good-quality printer.

Just remember to always be considerate of your guests as you build the seating chart. It is wise to have your parents and others close to the family review the chart to make certain you have not overlooked an old feud or uncomfortable relationship, thereby unknowingly placing those guests at the same table.

Wedding Myth #5
Buffets are cheaper than plated dinners.

It is often assumed that buffets are a money-saving option for dinner receptions. While buffets can be fantastic for offering guests a variety of choices, some food options can still be rather costly, especially when including one or more carving stations. While a self-service buffet minimizes wait staff, it does not allow for portion control. If not properly managed, a self-service buffet can leave the last guests in line with food that is past its prime, cold or even without food at all. One option to control portions is to have your caterer provide wait staff to “serve” portions from one side of the buffet to the guests as they move through the line on the other side of the buffet. This not only provides portion control, but it also allows wait staff to monitor when food needs to be replenished.  

Another meal service concept that is growing in popularity is the “family-style” meal. Family-style food service is typically less expensive than a traditional plated meal and your guests will feel the reception is more personal with this style of service. It also eliminates people standing in a long buffet line. A family-style meal is a little less formal—with the food brought out to each table on platters and serving dishes to be passed around the table for each guest to fill their own plates. The serving dishes remain on the table and are refilled by wait staff as needed. It is important to secure the services of a chef, wedding planner or venue that has experience with this style of service. Having an experienced wait staff will really make all the difference. Also, keep in mind the logistics of the table itself as you plan room for the platters and serving dishes. 
With this style of service, you will keep centerpieces and table decorations to a minimum so that serving dishes will fit comfortably.

Finally, don’t count out the benefits of a plated-dinner reception which can still allow your guests choices while bringing an added level of elegance to your reception. There’s nothing quite like being served a beautifully-plated delicious meal to make guests feel pampered and satisfied. Be certain to include the entrée choices on your response card and track the selections for your caterer.

Wedding Myth #6
A big second wedding is inappropriate.

Just because you had a big wedding before, doesn’t mean you can’t do it again. Don’t tone down your wedding simply because things didn’t work out with your previous marriage. Your vows are just as important for your second wedding as they were the first time around, so celebrate your love in a big way if that is what you desire. Every couple deserves their day, so plan a wedding that truly celebrates your union. Your wedding day is about celebrating the love you and your fiancé share for one another. If you want to share your joy by throwing a big party for your guests, it really doesn’t matter who might object.

Wedding Myth #7
It is bad luck for your fiancé to see you before you walk down the aisle.

It is definitely not bad luck for the wedding couple to see one another before the walk down the aisle. Honoring this age-old tradition is a matter of choice for the couple. Since great wedding photos are a top priority for some couples, it is much more convenient, and just as romantic, to photograph a “first look” before you walk down the aisle. Plus, think of all the benefits that come from taking photographs early. Your guests will not be waiting for two hours before the wedding party arrives at the reception. Also, you and your soon-to-be spouse will be able to spend much more of the day together enjoying each other. It even affords you the time to sneak off and take some wedding couple photos in a unique location, capturing precious memories from your big day.

If you want to follow tradition and wait for your partner to see you walk down the aisle, there’s nothing wrong with that either. The moment will be special either way. Just decide what is comfortable for you and not what you think you “should” do.

Keep in mind there are no longer steadfast rules when it comes to proper decorum for today’s weddings. The best advice is to always be tasteful in your choices and considerate of your wedding party, family and guests. Make your decisions based upon how best you can celebrate your love on this very special day with people that truly care about you. |NWD|